"like sky-blue air" (part 1)

A little while ago, a visitor to this site left a comment regarding the apparent suicide of an actress. I have looked at a few Hollywood deaths because they came to my attention in one round about way or another. The information that comes my way does so via word of mouth. I followed Jaspal's link & found Lucy Gordan whom I'm sure you all know about. It was her method of death that made me take notice as well as her linking with Heath Ledger - both synching up for me with the death of Adrienne Shelly in 2006.

"Former Oxford High School pupil Lucy appeared in the 2002 film The Four Feathers with Heath Ledger, 28, the Australian star who died from a drug overdose last year. Lucy died two days before her 29th birthday and hours before she was due to be interviewed at the Cannes film festival." (Adrienne Shelly was waiting to hear from the Sundance Film Festival).

I had thought this would have been a continuation of that Fair Phantom series, but instead a different path has opened up.

This last week has been a struggle for me. I've had the worst head cold I've ever had & it led to some nights where breathing was a struggle. Is it a coincidence that I should start researching hanging at this time?



I have to admit that in the beginning I was pretty immune to hanging, after all I grew up with it.


Hanging is very familiar to us as both as a historical fact & as a popular method of dispatching victims in murder mysteries. It also turns up from time to time in the news. I was also fairly desensitised to the siblings of hanging - strangulation & suffocation - I simply recognised the words & what they meant on a descriptive level.

Researching hanging has been the worst thing I've ever looked into. I was so afraid of slipping onto a site where I would see what I could not unsee. My friend Michael from Hidden Agendas has been helping me, as well as allowing a firing back & forth of ideas, so I owe him a big thank you for his strength & his ideas which are also a part of this article.



Hanging is ugly beyond words. Wiki states thusly: "Hanging is the lethal suspension of a person by a ligature. The Oxford English Dictionary states that hanging in this sense is "specifically to put to death by suspension by the neck." I won't be posting any pics.

Memories of hanging on tv or in stories has always been clean & tidy, with the sad but pathetic figure of a still body suspended by the neck. The often familiar suicide scene set in police cells.

Wiki on suicide: "In Canada, hanging is the most common method of suicide, and in the U.S., hanging is the second most common method, after firearms. In Great Britain, where firearms are less easily available, as of 2001 hanging was the most common method among men and the second-most commonplace among women (after poisoning)."

A little more fact "...There are four ways of performing a judicial hanging — the short drop, suspension hanging, the standard drop, and the long drop."

The more I looked at hanging the uglier it became. The descriptions of the different methods of hanging, reeked of cold-blooded murder. I was informed that hanging was a blood free method that was easy to carry out & thus was adopted widely.

Bollocks.

Recently historical mis-facts have been 'coming to light' & we are being 'treated' to 'the truth' - history is being cleansed of exaggeration. One such cleansing is the revelation that almost all witches were hanged rather than burned - ahh what a relief, that's all right then.

Calculated hanging (a more recent invention) was designed to break a human beings neck - it required (cold-blooded) planning - "The standard drop, which arrived as calculated in English units, involves a drop of between four and six feet (1.2 to 1.8 m) and came into use from 1866, when the scientific details were published by an Irish doctor, Samuel Haughton."

This being seen to be an improvement on the short drop - "A ladder was also commonly used with the condemned being forced to ascend, after which the noose was tied and the ladder pulled away or turned...The condemned prisoner dies of strangulation, typically between ten and twenty minutes. Before 1850, it was the main method."

There are horrific variations of what people suffer & this includes loss of control of bowels & bladder.

Human history is shamefully full of murders & a huge amount of this was through hanging. I think it was writing so recently about air that made me sit up & start asking questions. All killing is wrongful, but I believe there are reasons to ask questions about why hanging has been such a 'popular' & worldwide sport for thousands of years.

When I wasn't sure whether or not I should write about this topic I was inundated with synchs. I was drawn to a book at the library, called 'The Way of the Dream.' On opening it randomly, I found myself looking at a chapter entitled The Hanged Man. Within that chapter was a wealth of information. in particular we are told that hanging is a type of negative deification & we are reminded that the God of Western Civilisation was, after all, a hanged man. Indeed wiki says that hanging "... also referred to crucifixion and death by impalement in which the body would remain "hanging"."


"gallows c.1230, pl. of M.E. galwe "gallows," from... P.Gmc. *galg- "pole" (cf. O.Fris. galga, M.H.G. galge "gallows, cross")... Originally also used of the cross of the crucifixion. Plural because made of two poles."

"Hanging is one of the most ancient forms of execution. The Book of Esther, for example, centers on the hanging of the genocidal traitor Haman, and British and U.S. law have always incorporated death by hanging."

So my question is this "Was hanging designed to impact upon the human psyche & if so why?"

You do not need me to include a picture of a noose, in order to understand what I'm referring to do you?

Well actually you do - here is one I borrowed earlier



"noose: c.1450, from O.Fr. nos or cognate O.Prov. nous "knot," from L. nodus "knot." ."

A noose is a knot. A browse in the wikimarket aisle of death reveals: "According to popular belief, the hangman's noose must have 13 coils... Also, tradition holds that nooses be wrapped in a left-hand spiral." Nothing strange about that then.

I remembered a little book I used to own on natural magic. I remembered that it had a chapter on knot magic. I went to the library & found it - magic! It told me that "knot magic stretches back "at least 4000 years."

Then I went to the Internet as it's easier to cut & paste, than type out passages.

"Throughout history many different traditions and peoples have believed that knots in cords are magical, and can be tied or released to activate the spell. There is the famous Greek myth of Jason and the Agurnaughts , who had a magic cord, as he released the knots, it released the winds."

"...especially in Celtic lands where, it was believed, the Faerie folk could not be held in any knot, the skill of tying knots was a faerie gift. A very sacred and holy thing."

"...some of the best knots are used for binding an enemy, symbolically tying up the enemies intestines, shortening someones life, or sending them to the gallows, and other such lovelies from the horror hit parade."

"Tying up an illness, binding a demon, securing someones love - for all these things and more, knots were used. In older times illness or misfortune was regarded as an evil Spirit to be bound up in cloth or rope, therefore inhibiting its progress."


"The gods, perceiving now that ordinary bonds, however strong, would never prevail against the Fenris wolf’s great strength, bade Skirnir, Frey’s servant, go down to Svart-alfa-heim and bid the dwarfs fashion a bond which nothing could sever."

"We can take another look at knot work, in the specialised skills of old fashioned midwifery. As soon as a child is born, and the umbilical cord is cut and tied, this is the first act of magic practiced upon the new born infant, and in older times, the midwife would have been responsible for giving the child his future good fortune, by saying a little prayer or blessing as the cord is cut and tied, securing his future health and happiness."

"It was believed that witches of old cast a death spell over a person by tying the knots and then hiding the cord, and the only way to undo the spell was to find the secreted cord and untie each knot."

A bit far fetched you think?

Well... legend has it that the Prophet Mohammed was bewitched by an evil man & his daughters, who tied 11 knots in a cord & hid it in a well. Mohammed had all but kicked the bucket (though not the one in that particular well), when God intervened & sent an obliging archangel to reveal the secret location & the advise on the unspelling techniques.

In the Koran there is a request for protection "from the evil of those who practice witchcraft when they blow in the knots"

A book entitled Knot Craft tells us that in a show of hands scenario, Plato would have raised both of his in favour of the death penalty for 'those who injured others by means of magic knots.'


Witches & sorcerers were believed to have the power to bind the wind with knots & sometimes these were sold to sailors - "loose one knot, you get mild winds. Two knots gives stronger winds and three hard storms" - at last a way to make a little money on the side - I wonder if I'd have to pay tax on that?

In Western African witchcraft, the tying of a knot while saying a person's name gave the 'knotter' power over the 'namee'.

We cannot slip (knot) by this search without a little 1st degree look at la maison de masons

"...A hangman's noose is then placed around his neck, the end of the rope hanging down behind him. He is blindfolded." I couldn't help thinking of this masonic ritual & rolled up trouser legs'n'things when I first spied this painting. (You have to click on it, it won't come to you, but be warned it's a painting of a hanging)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Pisanello_010.jpg

Seeking,(knot searching) elicited a few more images

From a carving at the da Vinci ..err sorry I mean Rosslyn Chapel "One carving may show a blindfolded man being led forward with a noose around his neck -- similar to the way a candidate is prepared for initiation into Freemasonry. The carving has been eroded by time and pollution and is difficult to make out clearly"


"There are few known figures of the period showing nooses about their necks. The best known is the statue called 'The dying Gaul'."



I have also read that the common or garden variety neck tie is a variation on a knot theme



"The tie is a noose turned upside down.It tightens around the neck. The closing tension is not caused by an intentional collapse-of-the-body-beneath-the-weight-of-the-world, but an auspicious and determined yank of the arm towards it."

Should you still doubt there is weight behind knots just recall what happens when you get married & 'tie the knot'. I don't know if business mens ties come in red tape (they should do) for they are so often the purveyors of 'binding' agreements. How often have you used the phrase that "something was bound to happen"?

For every article written there is a ton of information left out. This article has tested my endurance during a week when I have felt way below par. The worst thing was reading (but trying not to) about the effects of hanging on human beings, you know those people like you & me. With any luck I'll now go to the wiki page on hanging for the last time:

It seems that on top of all the other atrocities of hanging, men often get erections when hung "It was a common belief in some countries that a mandrake plant would grow in the shadow of a gallows, where the semen of a hanged man dripped on to the earth; this would appear to be the reason for the methods employed by the alchemists who, in alchemy terms, "projected human seed into animal earth."

Thus far in this article we have looked at an act of murder that has been accepted in human society for thousands of years. We have added the suggestion that hanging is a ritual (possibly a sexual ritual) using knot magic. I have to leave this for now. There is much more to come as we look at just why the neck has been targeted & what that has meant or means for humanity.

"Now your cord must be programmed for a specific purpose such as healing or as a magickal storage system for use in any number of things in the future."

a world, a part

The 'Western' "stern (n) c.1300, "hind part of a ship, steering gear of a ship" world has been in the driving (steering) seat for quite a while now.

Yesterday I got an email at work that reminded me of how un-average the supposedly average human being is.

I was also delightfully reminded that while rules "rule (n) c.1225, "principle or maxim governing conduct," from O.Fr. riule, from V.L. *regula, from L. regula "straight stick, bar, ruler, pattern," are to do with putting life on a manage-mentally convenient straight & narrow course, life is about quirky travels with quirky people in quirky situations.

I was not able to transpose the pics on my email, so I've come up with an assortment along the same lines. Although the following pictures do not denote the hyped-happy lifestyle of successful western living, they do show that when boundaries are not finely drawn, they can be pushed a lot (creatively) farther than we may think.
































I found this line at My Favorite Monsters & thought it very apt;

"...nor do we recognize the irrationality of this world and its frauds: that it lies to us."

The pics above reminded me that there is no 'right' way to live & that choosing according to what serves me best, rather than by say how it looks, is an ok concept.

Un-average humans do not all live in the same kind of homes & drive the same kind of vehicles & work the same kind of hours & live the same kind of weekends. Un-average humans are spectacularly creative & inventive & know that impossible things are the best kinds of challenge.

So how many people do you reckon you can you get in your car (or on your bike) then?

A change of outfit

Sometimes a kick in the ass sets you off in a new direction.

A couple of days after I typed my last article I went back to read an article Matthew Delooze had posted. It was quite a strongly worded little post & included the butt kicking paragraph;

"Maybe we should also open our eyes and look at ourselves, the sheep, the sad punters on the forums and the sad anonymous bloggers, which are currently and continually trapped in a comical loop simply seeking a messiah or a bit more info on this, that and the other. Are we becoming nothing more but a herd of suicidal Lemmings running from one website to another or from one book/DVD to another whilst pathetically thinking our destiny is sorted if we subscribe to a guru or a stable of speakers at a conference to tell us what to do, the climax being when we all jump of the same cliff."

The rest of it's here
http://www.oneballradio.com/node/423

Anyway my butt hurt after that. I've been blogging (anonymously) for over a year now. I write because I love it & because I would like to be a part of shuffling off this goddamn awful mortal hamster-coil that masquerades as living & to find out what real living is all about.

Way back when I joined blogger, I was unsure at first even about commenting, but step by step I got 'braver', felt the drive to say or do more. I took the name wise woman for a number of reasons - it had been coming up in my life for a while & I'd used it as a fun password at one time. I originally had some reservations about using that name as I figured it might sound rather pretentious. But there was a gut feeling that told me that the name was mine to use, so I took it.

It's a funny thing, but in my life some of the most important things have come about via jokes. My son's name was one of them. His name started out as a joke & then somewhere along the way, an intensity took over that would allow for no other name.

So it was like that with wise woman - you see it was a joke. A joke between my brother & me. We were both fans of the English TV series Blackadder & would often quote lines from it to each other (we still do). There was one particularly memorable episode where my brother's name is mentioned & it became a kind of piss-take between us. The Wise Woman also appeared in that episode. Blackadder seeks her help when he finds himself attracted to his manservant (actually a woman in disguise).




Blackadder: No, no. No, it’s far worse than that. I’m in love with my manservant.

Wise Woman: I’d sleep with him if I were you. When I fancy anyone I sleep with them. Oh I have to drug them first of course, being so old and warty.

It's ok I'm having treatment for the warts.



Anyway, this has been wise woman's claim to fame. It was a name that allowed me to feel free enough to launch myself into speaking up in a way that I thought was not possible for me. I have drawn great strength from that name - somehow it allowed me to be more than I thought I could be.

However Matt's words made me think again. They are timely words. They needed to be spoken. It is easy to go so far & then stop.

But surely we came here to do more.

I don't know if 2012 is anything or nothing, but the control factor that's at work in this world certainly seems to be reaching a frenzy. It is perhaps necessary to re-look at what we are working to achieve. As spiritual as we might like to be we are also thoroughly physical - somehow a balance between the two seems vital. This world is not something apart from us - the air that is outside is also inside of us & constantly moving back & forth - we are a part of all this or we are asleep.

So I've decided to become un-anonymous, however my aim is to integrate wise woman into the fabric of my life & not have her simply as an alter ego who comes out at that computer. I have no answers at all, but I do know I reject this recycling hamster wheel & I call on the return of life.

Much thanks to my friend Michael from Hidden Agendas who played around with my title & created this new look.

Best to you all

Alex

On Matthew Delooze & my friends

I got a newsletter this morning from Matt Delooze - nothing personal, I'm just signed up to receive them. He sounded worn out & disillusioned (sounds I've been hearing from quite a few researchers lately).

I have mentioned Matt from time to time in my articles. I do not know him personally, I've emailed him a few times & he has almost always replied.

The thing is, I owe Matt a huge debt of gratitude - perhaps debt is not the right word - I hold an immense feeling of thanks towards him - immense is probably not the right word either, should be something bigger.

I found his work through the David Icke website. I remember spending about a week eating up his articles. It was in 2007, the year I played deadly serious & made the decision to live as opposed to merely keep on existing. That was the year I went to Hawaii, as I've written about before. Less than one month after that I was off again, this time to Sydney, again with my son, at the unbelievable (to me) invitation of my ex-husband.

At that time I had tried & failed to get a hold of Matthew Delooze's then new book "Is it Me for a Moment', so had asked my ex if he could get it & bring it with him (he lives in Europe). On my first night in Sydney I began reading. As with his other work, the book hit home.

As my son & his dad like to sleep in & I don't, I got up real early & took to the streets. There were cafes open even at that time, so I could sit & sip & read. Then I'd go exploring . I only had sight-seeing in mind, but somehow reading Matt's book I seemed to be seeing the sights in a whole new way. I felt then & it's still the same now, as if I was inside a living documentary with this down to earth Englishman doing the narrating.

My (inner)sight-seeing began with being taking aback by a weird statue, all symbols'n'things - wtf thought I! As I walked on, it seemed to me that everywhere I looked I was being met with high strangeness. Over the course of those 5 days, I walked & walked. I walked north, south, east & west. We were staying in the heart of the city and there was much to see.









Matt's ideas on the use of ritual for farming emotional respect was with me as I walked around the ANZAC memorial. After the repulsion I felt upon viewing of 'The Sacrifice,' I must admit I was on high alert when my son & I walked into the little museum to the side of that statue.



Was it just coincidence that we walked into that room just moments before the daily ritual rememberance ceremomy at 11.00am? I had no prior knowledge of it, yet it was that hijacking of our attention, with it's commandment to face east & re-member in silence, that had me outta there faster than a jackrabbit - I was AWARE that something was happening, though I didn't know what, only that I would NOT be a part of it. It was an intense decision at the time & I needed that intensity because it was a huge effort to break away from that scene - perhaps akin to how you'd feel being asked to do a strip tease at a funeral. This belief in the sacredness of sacrifice, pain & death is just so monumental.

Anyway there was much else in my trip to Sydney that has stayed with me, but it was that event that lead me here.

I emailed Matthew Delooze when I got back home, thanking him for his book & mentioning that I would like to send him some info about my experience. He kindly wrote back that that was ok but he was off to the Probe Conference.

So I sat down & put together as best I could what had happened, along with pics of The Sacrifice & surrounding areas in the hope of making more sense. When I'd finished, I stopped. I realised that if I sent that email that was IT - I would be committing myself to standing up - I didn't know how I might do that, but it meant no more standing on the side lines gazing in. I hit the send button.

I never heard back from Matt, I figured in the end that perhaps I sounded like a right lunatic. Now I think differently - well I mean I might well have sounded like a lunatic, but if he had answered, the compulsion to write would perhaps have evaporated - in fact it may be that my decision to stand up necessitated my not hearing back from him - because here I am & have been for the past year.

The journey to writing included one other incident that involved this man.

I went to Japan to see a talk by David Icke - a decision that appeared in my consciousness one day, I had mentioned to a couple of people that it would be neat to go (as perhaps that was the closest he'd get to NZ & he had been a big part of my initial waking up). Anyway the evening after I said this for a second time, up from somewhere inside bubbled the decision prepackaged - all I could do was giggle with surprise & say "Oh shit, I'm going to Japan!"

It was an amazing trip for me, really helping me see that I could depend on myself, as I went alone & found my way round very well in a country where English is not 'god'. I'd left myself an extra day after the talk to do a bit of normal sight-seeing.

However a train trip to Asakusa introduced me to a wtf building, La Flamme d'Or, also known as the Golden Turd. Antennae rippling I went in for a closer look. Pretty weird n'est-ce pas?

La Flamme d'Or (the Golden Flame - completely unsymbolic) - also known as the Golden Turd.

On the return train journey to my Ryokan (traditional Japanese hotel), my eye was caught by a theme park with Ferris wheel & dome & pyramid - all symbols I'd learned about through Matt's work. Here was an opportunity to take a few snaps to send to him as a 'token thank' you for all the awakening he'd inspired in me.

Ferris wheel pyramid & obelisk all situated right beside Tokyo Dome just as Matt Delooze predicts.


A fun ride or rather interesting symbol?

It was persisting down that day & after re-affirming that my shoes were not waterproof, I returned to my hotel & did a bit of drying out & Internet researching. I found that the ..err 'creator' of La Flamme d'Or, Phillipe Starck had another masterpiece in Odaiba in Tokyo Bay - a golden obelisk, plus there was a whopping great Ferris Wheel there - well what could I do but go forth & investigate.

"Starck's career started to climb in earnest in 1982 when he designed the interior for the private apartments of the French President Francois Mitterand" otherwise known as the man who ordered the bombing of the Greenpeace vessel, the Rainbow Warrior in Auckland Harbour in 1985 in Operation Satanic.

http://toolonginthisplace.blogspot.com/2008/02/following-trail-at-end-of-rainbow.html

I was due to fly home the next day & needed to vacate the hotel by 2.00pm. To get to Odaiba in Tokyo Bay required 4 train changes. I got up real early that morning.

The first thing that stands out as you cross the Rainbow Bridge is The Ferris Wheel

"The Odaiba Ferris Wheel is the largest one in the world with a diameter of 100 meters and a height of 115 meters above ground. It is the symbol of the Palette Town. ... The whole of Tokyo Bay can also be seen, with the highlight of the ride being the magnificent Rainbow Bridge, which is regarded as the symbol and pride of Tokyo Bay. Rainbow Bridge lights in the evening and with a little imagination, appears just like a huge rainbow stretching across the bay, with the cars like shooting stars dashing through the rainbow. The Ferris Wheel itself also lights up in the evening, and by itself is a very pretty sight." Note: I'm not sure if this is correct about it being the largest Ferris Wheel, but certainly one of the largest.





The rest of Odaiba was an eye opener, full of wtf symbolic buildings - I mean this is Japan - what was the Statue of Liberty doing there, or a Rainbow Bridge or a Venus Fort (shopping centre)- all too, too weird unless of course there's a little more to what we see than what we see.















Both these events condensed into articles along the way. I don't know that I'd be writing today without my experiences of them. My gratitude to Matthew Delooze & others like him, who give their time & knowledge freely is unbounded. None of us are in this alone, others can add immensely to our lives, mostly just by helping to keep our eyes & minds open. I am wary of answers, they close doors & minds.

I thank all those I have learned from & continue to learn from. Ellis Taylor opened my eyes to other worlds. Aferrismoon opened my eyes to playing with words. Michael from Hidden Agendas taught me about friendship & Devin from My Favourite Monsters about keeping going no matter how great the challenge. There are many others who have added & continue to add to my life. I thank them sincerely.

When I wrote my first Sacrifice article, I mentioned Matt Delooze's influence only briefly - in part because I'd had years of people changing the subject as soon as I began 'I read this book...', but also because I felt the topic I was talking about required full attention.

It has been my policy that my blog is about the sharing of & playing with, ideas. I feel free to write about what calls me because there is no one paying me to say what they want. However it is my choice today to bring Matt's upcoming talk to anyone who can go because he has put out a heart-felt plea for support, not financial, but physical & spiritual - a man who charges $4 for a 3 hour talk & includes tea & bikkies is not after your life savings. He is giving his time which equals his life to reach those who are ready to open their minds, as are all who give their time so freely on these blogs. I know the stories behind a number of writers, am aware of serious health issues yet still they they come & share their time & their energy.

So if you haven't read Matt Delooze then for absolutely no charge or commission I highly recommend him. Should you be anywhere within the vicinity of EUROPE on June 20th this year, go hear & support him.

From Matt's site
"Hello, I will be in Leicester on the 20th June 2009 doing a full Breaking the Serpent's Spell Talk. I will be including two half hour spells of special focus on 'life and death' (Had enough of living - Had enough of dying) and 'who should we trust' ( Soul saving Gurus?... or simply greedy sheep in wolves clothing?). Everyone is welcome. The admission is only £4. This admission charge is made to attempt to pay hire costs and transport costs etc. I am hoping to provide free tea coffee and the odd biscuit too. I need your support so please purchase your ticket in advance if you can."

Matt Delooze's talk is from 1pm - 4.30pm at the British Legion Club, 13 Main Street, Corner of Tennis Court Drive, Humberstone, Leicester, England (very close to the rest of Europe) on the 20th June.