Saturday, September 27, 2008

Knickers re-loaded

I've been pondering today on women - a result of the sadness I feel when I see pictures like the one that leads my last post (see below, I mean way below, on the last article), plus a book I've been reading called Women & Desire.

Women & Desire addresses the much pondered question of "What do women want?" & tells the tale of Sir Gawain & the Lady Ragnall. You may know this story, if not you may enjoy it
....sometime later... sorry I can only find the Wiki version & it's none too exciting.

"The story begins when the mystical knight Gromer Somer Joure challenges King Arthur to discover what women desire most, or face dire consequences. Arthur's nephew and knight Gawain sets out to answer the riddle for him, and eventually Gromer's sister, the hag Ragnelle, offers the solution if Gawain will marry her. Gawain selflessly consents to save his uncle, and Ragnelle reveals that what women desire most is sovereynté, to make their own decisions. With this answer Arthur wins Gromer's challenge, and much to his despair, the wedding of Gawain and Ragnelle goes ahead as planned.
Later, the new pair retire to the bedroom. After a brief pause, Gawain assents to treat his new bride as he would if she were attractive, but when he looks up, he is astonished to see the most beautiful woman he has ever seen standing before him. She explains she had been under a spell to look like a hag until a good knight married her; now her looks will be restored half the day. She gives him the choice to have her beautiful at night, when they are together, or during the day, when they are with others. Instead, he gives her the
sovereynté to make the choice herself. This answer lifts the curse for good, and Ragnelle's beauty returns permanently."

For what it's worth here are some thoughts I've thought today, though I must add they're just musings & in no way meant to be used as ammunition in the superbly programmed war of the sexes that we have fallen for hook, line & sinker. As a woman I come from a female perspective, but at the same time I feel a bit of an outsider in my sex, so hopefully this has a balancing effect.

The programming of the two sexes has proceeded upon very different lines. There must be numerous ways to look at this - one way for me is through the ancient Greeks who boldly steered 'manhood' down the heroism trail - see over there you can still see the dust rising.

Women on the other hand (& here I concur with the writer of Women & Desire) were graciously guided onto pedestals where their raison d'etre was beauty - the more beauty the higher the pedestal (& the more apparent power). Mastery of their fate was put in the hands of dusty heroes who owing to their soil encrustation saw these visions of loveliness as a reward earned by whatever dust-up they'd been a part of. The ladies on the other hand, believing that dust was bad for the complexion, declared they 'vanted' to be left alone & retired early to bed.

Oh well why not, it's no more silly than the reason men & women fight. Actually I was mostly being serious.

Some time ago I asked a male friend what he wanted most & he had no trouble in relating in detail his heart's desire. If I'd been asked that question I would have suddenly had a great urge to spring clean the entire house, in Winter, with a toothbrush!

Many times I have been frustrated by this inability to connect with my dreams & desires. I remember having unstoppable wants as a kid, even when being pressured into thinking of the 'poor in Africa/India'. But now I go blank. Some time ago when my son tried to help me by asking me to come up with 10 wishes, all I could think of was that I'd like a new duvet cover - he laughed at me (& I joined him). This leads me to wonder how women can ever achieve sovereynté, when they are not able to connect with what they want.

Today I've been thinking that to a woman, the word 'want' is very loaded. I think that women see it as in 'instruction', a directive. A want IS something to be procured, a kind of 'honour bound' duty - something that reaches into the soul & flips the ON switch.

If someone says they want something to me, I become focused on how to attain that - a desire has been spoken - I really don't think we have any concept of the 'magic charge' that accompanies the phrase I want when spoken with deep passion. I have seen 'miracles' occur when that desire is taken into the hearts of listeners. I'm not talking here of the engineered craving designed by the media. If you say you want something to a woman, or that you would like something, you may very well find it on your doorstep in the not too distant future.

I've been wondering what possible benefit to an engineered society would there be, to have women unable to connect with their desires. And in my wondering I find an interesting idea. Women create things, their bodies can form & hold a new child - this isn't a sexist thing, it's just how it is, it could have been the other way round. So a woman ripens things, her body has the ability to hold & nurture until fruition is reached. I have heard somewhere the idea that women can hold desires, dreams within their wombs also, using them as a kind of fertile & nurturing place until they are ready to be released. A friend of mine who comes from Nigeria told me that his culture believes that when a woman menstruates she is extremely powerful, more so than the strongest magician which is why they are banished during this time. Similar stories appear in the bible about women being 'unclean' in order to remove their presence (or their magic?).

So what would happen if women knew what they wanted & that they had a very fertile capacity to create it & that there were times when they were more powerful than the magicians who are running this show? Could this be why they have been relegated to second place. This second place has a very structured hierarchy & is extremely competitive. The energy that could be poured into recreating this world is twisted wickedly in this second place where looks count for so much & creativity is forgotten.

I'm also wondering if those in the 'know' are using women to 'create' cancer by having them place their intense focus on it through such sick practices as the upcoming Breast Cancer Awareness Month?

Please bow your head & repeat after me